Sunday, October 25, 2009

Amazing Grace


Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.
-John 3:20-21


As I sat in church today I realized how amazing God is! This weekend Cornerstone Church opened up a new 13 million dollar expansion to the church. The new auditorium sits over 2,000 people and is an amazing facility. What caught my attention today was not the new facility, but rather instead as I looked around at the 2000 people all worshiping together the idea that each person in that church has a God story whether they know it or not.

My Story: God used my greatest struggle to call me to him……..
I grew up like many people in the United States with two incredible parents that provided me every opportunity I could have ever dreamed of. They were always there to love and comfort my brother and I. There was never a price too great to pay in order to allow us to chase our dreams and pursue our passions. We were incredibly close as a family but were not overly close to God. Of course we believed that God existed and we knew there was a heaven and we knew that during Christmas and Easter we were to go to church but that was essentially the extent of our faith.

During my years growing up I began to excel on the basketball court and basketball became my passion and you could even say that it became my God. New doors began to open because of basketball and I was soon traveling around the United States competing at the highest level experiencing things I could have never imagined.

As I entered the 8th grade my passion for basketball was increasing as were my skills. In December of my 8th grade year I was called up to the varsity team and soon was in the starting line-up. The summer before my senior year I was ranked as one of the top 40 players in the country and received a full-ride scholarship to Iowa State. I finished my senior year with a state championship and headed to college to follow up my state championship with a Big 12 championship and freshman of the year honors.

I completed my basketball career as a three time All Big 12 selection and Academic All-American. According to the world I was where every kid could only dream about being. I had a life-time worth of experiences and stories; so everything should be great as I flipped to the next chapter of my life.

However, my life was far from happy. I had an inner torment occurring that I never thought would leave me alone. There were countless days in high school that I could not even pull myself out of bed to go to school. In college I feared walking on campus, I feared driving home, I feared what people were thinking, I feared the unknown, I feared life.

I suffered from something called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Most people have some general idea of what OCD is because it is usually associated with checking the locks on the door a few extra times, checking the knobs on the stove a few extra times, or washing of the hands a few more times than the average person. Actually it is much worse than what most people believe and it can be overwhelming and often controls every aspect of one’s life.

I could go on with all kinds of crazy stories of what I went through in high school and college, but I will stick to one quick example in order to allow all of you to enter my life for a brief moment. Usually obsessive compulsive disorder is not just over one aspect of a person’s life but rather it can be many different things. One of my issues was white objects. Yes, that is not a typo it is the truth. I could not stand anything white on the ground.

As you read this I am assuming you have never noticed all of the white objects on the ground. Oh but I have. Anytime I saw a white object (piece of paper, rock, wrapper, leaf, ect..) on the ground I had to pick it up and put it in my pocket. Now let me tell you the challenge of getting from Lagomarcino Hall on the Iowa State campus back to my dorm room or to Hilton Coliseum. It is about a ½ mile walk which should take about 15 minutes to walk, but I could easily turn that trip into a two hour ordeal and then when I arrived at my next destination I would have a pocket full of white things and enough anxiety to kill me. (It is ok to smile because I know it sounds just crazy)

I had many other crazy things affect me each day like 90 degree angles, how my shoe laces were tied, simply driving my car and the list could on and on. When I was going through the worst of this in high school and early on in college I was embarrassed to talk about it. The doctors just kept giving more and more medicine but yet nothing seemed to really help. I did not know how I was going to go on. My only comfort came while playing basketball. Then God stepped in.

First, he brought a manager to the Iowa State Basketball team named Dave Edwards who gave me my first Bible and challenged me every day to read it. I usually did not listen to him except when we nearly died on the propeller operated plane that we jumped on for road games. One day the plane would not start so they jumped it with a 15 passenger van. Even if you never wanted to read your Bible that experience would make you do it!!

As God was using Dave to intervene in my life a cute girl stopped by my dorm room asking if I wanted to come up to the 7th floor and watch the movie Love and Basketball. I did not really want to watch the movie but she was pretty cute so without thinking I jumped on the elevator and headed up to the 7th floor. The only problem was that I had just finished practice and my feet have a tendency to stink from time to time. In my hurry to meet this girl on the 7th floor I did not put on any shoes or socks. I never really realized the first impression my feet made on my wife but the smell must have put her in a trance because she has never left my side.

While my wife was still my girlfriend she dragged me to Salt Company which is the college ministry at Cornerstone Church. I will never forget that first night there when I looked around and saw the passion so many people had for Jesus. I began to wonder just what all of these people knew that I did not. Maybe that Bible Dave gave me had the answers I was waiting for. As we were leaving Salt Company God was not done intervening as the pastor came up to me and began to talk basketball. All I could think about was that I am in a church with a pastor that likes basketball. Maybe I should just come on Sunday and listen to what he has to say. I was a little unsure about coming after I saw that pastor screaming with all of those crazy fans in Hilton Coliseum. I remember thinking wow you can be pastor and still jump, cheer, and yell at a Cyclone game - that must be a pretty cool church.

While all of this was going on I was having a ton of success on the basketball court but was being tormented by my OCD like no one would ever know. As I struggled it seemed as though God showed up more and more. The Lord put one person after another in my life and I soon grew to know a wonderful church family.

I gave my life to Christ my Senior year in college. I really did not know what that fully meant at the time but I now know that God brought me out of a dark place filled with fear. Today I still struggle from time to time with the OCD and anxiety, but I no longer need the medication and the best part is when I do stumble to fears, I now have something much bigger than myself to lean on.

Have a great week!
Jake


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